Saturday, July 12, 2008

Chasing Butterflies

It's been insanely busy lately here in chance land which is good and bad. Good b/c the weeks are flying by and that's great; bad b/c there is too much to do and not enough time to do it.

I really can't wait for January to get here so we can have our first appointment and get moving on a de cycle. It hasn't been easy adjusting to pushing it back by 5/6 months. I feel strongly that we need to do it on a schedule that Banks is comfortable w/ it's just not always easy waiting. I'm thinking we already have one month down, I just have to focus on the little bits of time that are passing and not the total amount ahead.

Our friends stayed w/ us last weekend and brought their 14 month old. He's such a doll, he's a really good baby and so sweet. It made it a little harder on the waiting front but oddly enough not the IF front. Watching them w/ him just made me want that for us even more and that didn't help my impatience at all. Seeing him toddle around, chasing the dog, trying to play w/the controller. Not to mention he's a total mamma's boy and the way they are together just made me envious. I want what they have, me and Banks, and our child who's happy and healthy and loved. I'm ready for the changes that'll bring and want them. Banks just isn't there yet and that means staying patient for a while.

You can chase a butterfly all over the field and never catch it. But if you sit quietly in the grass it will come and sit on your shoulder.

1 comment:

Jojobee said...

Oh honey... I'm sorry you're going through this "waiting" period... But honestly, as slow as it sometimes feels it's going by, it'll be here before you know it! And once you start cycling, you'll be "where did the time go!? I can't believe we're already here!"
Many prayers & thought...
Jojobee